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VAR YOU SERIOUS?? PREMIER LEAGUE’S NEW ‘FOOLPROOF’ VAR SOLUTION

After a week of shocking VAR decisions affecting relegation and European possibilities, the Premier League have today revealed a revolutionary new system that, according to their spokesman, will ‘guarantee the correct decision every time’. This comes as a relief after more midweek mayhem.

That saw VAR officials fess up to as many as THREE wrong penalty decisions, including Man Utd’s Portuguese pirouette that left Villa in a spin and Spurs’ spurned spot-kick that managed to boost Bournemouth.

“It’s a no-brainer,” explained the spokesman, “Despite all the technology available, we needed to take VAR up another level – and that is precisely what we have done. It’s clear that we can have no end of replays at Stockley Park and still not be sure of the right decision – which is crap.

“But that is all in the past.” He smiled. “From now on, we will keep three officials outside the door – with headphones on. It’ll be just like in Mr&Mrs.

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